27 September 2013

Birthdays
Thomas Mann b. 1991 (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters)
Anna Camp b.1982 (True Blood)
Zita Görög b. 1979 (Underworld)
Gwyneth Paltrow b. 1972 (Iron Man, Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow)
Tamara Taylor b.1970 (Serenity)
Patrick Muldoon b. 1968 (Starship Troopers)
Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa b. 1950 (Mortal Kombat, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Heroes)
Tom Braidwood b. 1948 (The X-Files)
Denis Lawson b. 1947 (Star Wars)
Roger C. Carmel b. 1932 died 11 November 1986 (Star Trek)

An all-actor list of birthdays today. Putting Gwyneth Paltrow in the Picture Slot can be justified by the Pretty Girl rule and the fact she is the only A-list movie star in this group. If the decision was instead based on most iconic sci-fi roles, Denis Lawson was Wedge in the original Star Wars and Roger C. Carmel was Harcourt Fenton Mudd on Star Trek.

Many happy returns of the day to those still alive.
 

In the Year 2000!

Prediction: A machine will turn eggs into chicks almost immediately.

Predictor: French postcards from the first decade of the 1900s predicting the year 2000.

Reality: From what I can gather, artificial incubators get eggs to hatch at about the same speed as do the eggs that hens sit on. It's about the rates at which cells grow and split, a process humans have done very little to change. This illustration is one of many that appear to be whimsical, like the one about modern educational processes.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

We are back in 1893 asking prominent folk to look 100 years into the future, and tomorrow we hear from a fellow whose fame has survived because of the company he founded, W.R. Grace.

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE! 

20 September 2013

Birthdays
Spencer Lock b. 1991 (Resident Evil)
Charlie Weber b. 1978 (Buffy)
Moon Bloodgood b. 1975 (Terminator Salvation)
N’Bushe Wright b. 1970 (Blade)
Ben Edlund (writer, Angel, The Tick)
Kristen Johnson b. 1967 (Third Rock from the Sun)
Michael Hurst b. 1957 (Hercules, Xena)
Brinke Stevens b. 1954 (Bad Girls From Mars)
Steve Gerber b. 1947 died 10 February 2008 (writer, Man-Thing, Howard the Duck)
George R.R. Martin b. 1946 (The Song of Ice and Fire)

Any of the actresses on the list meets the Cute Girl criterion for the Picture Slot, but I'm handing it to the guy who is the best known name on the list as of 2013, George R.R. Martin. I'm a bit surprised that none of the books in the series that is the basis for Games of Thrones has yet won a Hugo or Nebula, but I get the feeling he'll get one or maybe both when the next one comes out, given how much the popularity of the books has been enhanced by the TV series.

I was not aware until I researched this that Steve Gerber was dead. I really liked the Howard the Duck comic books, but the movie was one of the biggest missteps of George Lucas' career, and that's saying something.

Many happy returns to the living on the list.

Holiday
Unification Day. In the universe of Firefly and Serenity, this is the day that celebrates the end of the long civil war. My main problem with this is that the people in the new solar system would probably would have to redefine a year based on the orbits of the various planets in the system.

In the year 2000!

Prediction: Planes will be used in battle to drop bombs on the enemy.

Predictor: One of the series of French postcards released in the decade of the 1900s

Reality: I'm guessing this artist's rendering is done pre-Kitty Hawk, so the design of the plane is not actually a thing that could get airborne, but this is the most accurate of all the ideas the German and French postcards had about what we would do once heavier than air flight was possible. The high ground has been understood as an advantage in battle for a very long time, and planes take that height advantage one step further.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

On Saturdays, we travel back to 1893 to see what they thought 1993 would look like. Tomorrow we'll hear from labor leader James William Sullivan.

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!

30 August 2013

Birthdays
Cameron Diaz b. 1972 (Shrek, The Mask, The Green Hornet)
Michael Chiklis b. 1963 (Fantastic Four, No Ordinary Family)
Mark Strong b. 1963 (Kick-Ass, Stardust)
Frank Conniff b. 1958 (Mystery Science Theater 3000, Invader ZIM)

The predictable Picture Slot choice would be fabulous babe Cameron Diaz, but I decided to throw the change-up today and go with the actor/writer whose work I most admire, Frank Conniff, known to the true nerds as TV's Frank on Mystery Science Theater 3000. He also worked on Invader ZIM, one of my favorite cartoons of the 21st Century, right up there with The Venture Brothers.

Many happy returns of the day to everyone on the list.

 

Prediction: People will go on scenic rides in the country without ever leaving their homes

Predictor: French postcards printed between 1900 and 1910

Reality: This is comparable to the German chocolate postcard of an entire city block being moved by train. This is only a single house, so this is closer to the reality of the big mobile homes, though the wheels are ridiculously small. Also, I imagine having a fire going and smoke coming out of the chimney has to break some codes.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

Yet another Song of the Future, once again from David Bowie.

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!

26 July 2013

Birthdays
Olivia Williams b. 1968 (Dollhouse)
Kevin Spacey b. 1959 (Superman Returns)
Nana Visitor b. 1957 (Deep Space Nine, Battlestar Galactica)

In terms of overall fame, I would say Mr. Spacey is the best known actor on this list, but in terms of being recognized for genre work, the nod goes to Ms. Visitor.

And besides, the website is woefully short of women with crinkle cut fries on their noses.

Many happy returns to all concerned.

 

In the year 2000!

Prediction: Cops in flying suits will direct traffic in the air over Paris.

Predictor: French postcards from the turn of the 20th Century.

Reality: Um, guys... physics? Besides no flying suit being able to do this, the cop probably wouldn't want to be that close to a propeller.

Points in the favor of this picture is that the planes are close to the right shape. These postcards were produced up to 1910, so this could have been after actual heavier than air flying craft existed, but at least there is a propeller instead of flapping wings.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

Songs from the future features the first song from an album that gets my vote for the best single side of vinyl of all time.


Cue the synthesizers.

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!  

5 July 2013

Birthday
Ronald D. Moore (Battlestar Galactica, Star Trek) 

As much as I like to have pictures of actors in the picture slot (and let's face it, by actors I mean pretty actresses), I'm also glad to have the writers of science fiction represented. The written word is where this all starts.

Many happy returns to Mr. Moore, of course. 

In the year 2000!

Prediction: Madame at her toilette will be attended not by a ladies' maid but by clever mechanical devices designed to make her more lovely.

Predictor: A series of French postcards about the year 2000 published at the beginning of the 21st Century.

Reality: It's not realistic, but it looks a lot safer than the similar contraption designed for men.

Looking TWO WHOLE DAYS ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

This weekend, we'll enjoy two predictions from a 1956 novel by James Blish. He's by no means perfect, but he's a damn sight better than Heinlein or Clarke.

 Join me then... IN THE FUTURE!

21 June 2013

Movies released
Minority Report released, 2002

I know it's Tom Cruise, but it's also Steven Speilberg and Philip K. Dick, so I don't that bad saying I actually liked Minority Report, though it did feel like it could have ended thirty minutes earlier than it did. The world looked both futuristic and a little run down, which adds to the realism.

The action is supposed to take place in 2054, which is too far into the future for me to consider it to be verifiable or falsifiable.
 

In the year 2000!

Prediction: People in diving suits will ride giant mutant sea horses for entertainment.

Predictor: French postcards published in 1900

Reality: In a recent comment thread, I said that John Elfreth Watkins was good but tended to be on the cautious side, and his record is better than the later sci-fi writers who are making predictions decades later about 2000 because of his caution and not being enamored of space travel like Clarke, Niven and Heinlein. Space travel didn't exist and did not even look like an option in 1900, and Watkins was not a fiction writer who enjoyed flights of fancy.

I could compare him to the French and German postcards, who are making predictions from 1900 about 2000.

Watkins whips them like red-headed stepchildren.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

We get a look at a racist's future wet dream.

No, I'm not talking about Paula Deen on a sugar and butter rush.

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!

24 May 2013

Birthdays
Dash Mihok b. 1974
Greg Berlanti b. 1972
Michael Chabon b. 1963
(won 2008 Hugo and Nebula for The Yiddish Policeman’s Union)
Alfred Molina b. 1953
Jim Broadbent b. 1949
Carmine Infantino b. 1925 died 4 April 2013 

Quite an impressive list of birthday boys today. Mihok is an actor in several genre films including I am Legend and The Day After Tomorrow, Berlanti's work is on the other side of the camera in the Green Lantern movie and the TV show Arrow. Chabon is a writer, of course, and Infantino was a comic book artist. My two favorites are the two actors who are slightly older than I am, and Alfred Molina gets the picture slot for his short role at the beginning of Raiders of the Lost Ark.

In the year 2000!

Prediction: Books will be turned into audio (by grinding?) and the students will listen intently. The teacher will not lecture but instead merely choose the book to be turned into lessons.

Predictor: French postcards produced in 1900

Reality: A lot of the French postcards are on the cruel side and I think they are mostly meant to be funny. This one is obviously whimsical, but in its defense as a prediction, there are audio textbooks now and they didn't exist when this was drawn. Moreover, as a teacher I can say that one hell of a lot of my students wear headphones in class. Getting them to take the headphones off is the real trick.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

Predictions from Jack London's The Iron Heel about both war and peace a century ago, which is to say about five years in the future from when he wrote the book.
 

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!

3 May 2013

Birthday
Christina Hendricks b. 1975

Movies released
Spider-Man released 3 May 2002

While Ms. Hendricks' best known role is as Joan on Mad Men, genre fans may know her best from two appearances on the quickly cancelled cult classic Firefly. Many happy returns to Ms. Hendricks, of course.

 

In the year 2000!

Prediction: Advance sentinel will scout from the air in baskets held aloft by a small rotor blade mounted above the craft.


Predictor: French postcards from 1900

Reality: Let's remember that this is before the Wright Brothers get airborne in 1903, so the artist can be forgiven for underestimating the size of the rotor blade necessary to achieve enough upward thrust to fly.

I often mock the French. I am an American and it is an important part of our cultural heritage. But if John Elfreth Watkins described this in one of his predictions, I'd likely give him full points, so it's only fair to give credit where credit is due. Even to the French.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

Many of the predictions from the early 1900s take an optimistic view of what's to come, but tomorrow we will meet a dark futurist whose 1907 book about the future foresaw a brutal class war. His name is Jack London.

 
Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!

19 April 2013

Birthdays
Hayden Christensen b. 1981
James Franco b. 1978

If you have only see Hayden Christensen in Star Wars, try to find Shattered Glass, in which he plays real life disgraced journalist Stephen Glass. It changed my opinion about his acting abilities by quite a bit and for the better.

 

In the year 2000!

Prediction: Airships and blimps will drop bombs on ships in a sea battle.

Predictor: French postcards from 1900

Reality: If we ignore the blimp in the foreground, all the rest of the planes look to be heavier than air flying craft. This is a prediction a few years before the Wright Brothers first get one of their contraptions airborne in 1903.

You might think it's easy to predict something that happens just a few years in the future, but it isn't. When you look at much of science fiction, it is the very rare writer indeed who sees how far computers will advance in the space of a few decades, and they had the advantage of writing their stories after the first computers were operational, big clunky beasts that they were. I might dock this prediction half a point for thinking blimps would still be in the forefront, but I can be a very strict grader at times.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!
 
Do you remember all the things AT&T predicted were just around the corner in their 1993 ads?  Tomorrow... you will.
 

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!

22 March 2013

Birthdays
Matthew Modine b. 1959
William Shatner b. 1931

Mr. Modine has done a lot of work, very little of it in genre films, but he was in The Dark Knight Rises. Mr. Shatner, of course, is best remembered for his work on T.J. Hooker.

I kid. I'm a kidder.

Many happy returns to both gentlemen.
 

In the year 2000!

Prediction: Humans living underwater will "fish" for seabirds, setting bait on the surface of the water and then dragging the creatures down until they suffocate.


Predictor: French postcards published in 1900

Reality: We are not living underwater for the most part, what with our lungs being built to extract oxygen for the air instead of the water. As for fishing for seabirds, the hook in the food would have to pierce through the bird's bill, not an easy task. More than that, if this actually worked it would be an extremely cruel way to kill these poor creatures, dragging them underwater until they drown.

Of course, it is just as cruel to kill a fish using similar methods. In fishing's defense, let me say that lots of fish make mighty good eating. I've read enough Patrick O'Brian novels to know that except for mutton birds, most seabirds are way too lean and stringy and not worth killing for food.

All of this is the roundabout way of saying we have another example of the French being jerks.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE! 

We got some Snake Plissken last weekend and now we are going back for seconds, this time escaping from Los Angeles instead of New York.
 
Join me then... IN THE FUTURE!
 

8 March 2013

In the year 2000!

Prediction: Barber shops will be completely mechanized.

Predictor: The French postcards from 1900

Reality: A machine with no viewing apparatus moving a straight razor around my face and neck? Oh, just shut up and take my money!

This is so dumb I have to think it possible someone was being ironic.

Looking TWO WHOLE DAYS ahead... INTO THE FUTURE! This weekend, we get World War III and World War IV, both of them already over by now and the survivors stuck in a weird apocalypse, brought to us by Harlan Ellison.

Join me then... IN THE FUTURE!

15 February 2013

In the Year 2000!

Prediction: Live performances will be accompanied by instruments played by robots.

Predictor: French postcards from 1900

Reality: The idea is not that far off, though the technology used and the location isn't on the money. At a nice theater like the one shown, there will probably still be a live orchestra, but lots of live vocal performances are sung to pre-recorded tracks, and not just at karaoke bars, isn't that right, Ms. Knowles-Carter?

Looking ahead one day... INTO THE FUTURE! Three words: Khan Noonien Singh.


Or I could make that one word. KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

Join me then... IN THE FUTURE!

1 February 2013

Birthday
Bill Mumy b. 1954

Next year I'll use a still from Babylon 5 for Mr. Mumy. Promise.

In the Year 2000!

Prediction: Humans, many now living underwater, will enjoy watching races where large fish are ridden like ponies.

Predictor: French postcards from 1900

Reality: Once again, the French have people in THE FUTURE acting like dicks. The exact species of the fish is hard to determine, but my best guess would be something related to barracuda.

Taming barracuda. Yeah, good luck with that. I'll watch from over here. No, on second thought I'll just wait until it's on the news, with the heart-wrenching interviews with the survivors.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE! In 1990, 82.4% of the world's population will be under 21 years old.

Hmmm, that could spell trouble. Run, Logan, run!

Join me then... IN THE FUTURE!

18 January 2013

 Birthdays
Jay Chou b. 1979  (Kato in the reboot of The Green Hornet)
Robert Anton Wilson b. 1932 died 1/11/2007
(never won a Hugo or Nebula)
(the blackballing bastards)

Okay, sue me. I liked his Illuminatus! books.

In the year 2000!

Last week, a 1900 German postcard imagined what it would be like if we had the power of flight. It was a world of pleasant weekend outings for well dressed people.

In this drawing from a 1900 French postcard, small flying hooligans are trying to steal eaglets from an aerie, beating back the understandably distraught mother eagle with a small stick.

This is just one of many of the French postcards that will make people who hate the French feel justified.


Looking one day... INTO THE FUTURE! Mind control becomes the seed for the apocalypse just around the corner.

Join me then... IN THE FUTURE!

4 January 2013

In the year 2000!

Prediction: Underwater vehicles are pulled by whales

Predictor: French postcards from the 1900 Paris Exhibition


Accuracy: Not good. A lot of predictions of what the future should look like are going to get the label "Humans to nature: Be our bitch" Most of these predictions will also have the label "Nature to humans: BITCH, PLEASE".

But when you think of it, putting harnesses on whales and making them swim where we want to go isn't nearly as cruel as killing them for meat and oil we don't really need.

Explanation for the young people: There was a time in the distant past when porn was scarce and difficult to obtain. (No, really. You can look it up or maybe ask your grandpa.) Back in those days, "French postcards" meant "pictures of nekkid wimmens". But in fact not all French postcards were smutty. Some were made for people whose unquenchable thirst was not for the dirty pictures and tingly feelings down there, but instead for knowledge of the future and the tingly feelings IN THE BRAIN! 

Fridays will be Antique Postcard Day. Besides these French postcards from the 1900 Paris Exhibition, there are also German postcards from the same era predicting THE YEAR 2000 distributed by a chocolate maker.

What does chocolate have to do with the future? I have no idea.

Looking ahead one day... INTO THE FUTURE! Our first prediction with an exact date, a date important in the history of time travel.

Join me then... IN THE FUTURE!