16 September 2014

 Birthdays
Kyla Pratt b. 1986 (Dr. Doolittle, Lois and Clark)
Max Minghella b. 1985 (Horns)
Madeline Zima b. 1985 (The Vampire Diaries, Heroes)
Michelle Lombardo b. 1983 (Click)
Alexis Bledel b.1981 (Parts Per Billion, Sin City, Tuck Everlasting)
Bingbing Fan b. 1981 (X-Men: Days of Future Past, Iron Man 3 (Chinese version), The White Haired Witch of Lunar Kingdom, Future X-Cops, Investiture of the Gods)
Amy Price-Francis b. 1975 (The Purge: Anarchy, Stephen King’s Dead Zone, Earthstorm, Mutant X)
Ed Stoppard b. 1974 (Branded, Nanny McPhee Returns, Relic Hunter, The Little Vampire)
Amy Poehler b. 1971 (Southland Tales)
Doug Cockle b. 1970 (Captain America: The First Avenger, Reign of Fire)
Sean Frye b. 1966 (Real Genius, E.T.)
Kurt Busiek b. 1960 (writer, Conan, Avengers, Superman, Astro City)
Jayne Brook b. 1960 (The Robinsons: Lost in Space, Gattaca, Superman IV: The Quest for Peace)
Danny John-Jules b. 1960 (Red Dwarf, Starhyke, Blade II, The Tomorrow People, Little Shop of Horrors)
Mike Mignola b. 1960 (writer, Hellboy)
Jennifer Tilly b. 1958 (Bride of Chucky, The Haunted Mansion, Embrace of the Vampire)
Kurt Fuller b. 1953 (Supernatural, Superhero Movie, The 4400, Carnivale, Charmed, The Tick, Timecop, Moonbase, Virus, Quantum Leap, Ghostbusters II, Elvira: Mistress of the Dark, The Running Man, Knight Rider)
Christopher Rich b. 1953 (Sabrina, the Teenage Witch, Babylon 5, The Charmings)
Mickey Rourke b. 1952 (Immortals, Sin City, Iron Man II, They Crawl)
Ed Begley Jr. b. 1949 (Brave New World [TV], Kingdom Hospital, Bug, Sabrina, the Teenage Witch, Meego, Star Trek: Voyager, Project: ALF, 3rd Rock from the Sun, Batman Forever, Faerie Tale Theatre, Transylvania 6-5000, Voyager from the Unknown, Voyagers!, Cat People, Battlestar Galactica [1978], Wonder Woman)
Linda Henning b. 1944 (Sliders, Mork & Mindy, My Living Doll)
Jules Bass b. 1935 (director, The Wind in the Willows, The Last Unicorn, The Flight of Dragons, Return of the King, Jack Frost, The Hobbit, 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, Frosty the Snowman, Mad Monster Party?, The New Adventures of Pinocchio)
George Chakiris b. 1934 (Pale Blood, Superboy, Wonder Woman, The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T.)
Anne Francis b. 1930 died 2 January 2011 (Conan [1997], Mazes and Monsters, Wonder Woman, The Invaders, The Satan Bug, Twilight Zone, Forbidden Planet, The Rocket Man)
Jack Kelly b. 1927 died 7 November 1992 (The Incredible Hulk, The Bionic Woman, Batman, Forbidden Planet)
Peter Falk b. 1927 died 23 June 2011(The Lost World [2001 TV movie], The Princess Bride, Wings of Desire, Twilight Zone)
Morgan Woodward b. 1925 (The X-Files, Knight Rider, Battle Beyond the Stars, The Incredible Hulk, Project U.F.O., Logan’s Run [TV], Planet of the Apes [TV], Star Trek)

Last year, the Picture Slot was Anne Francis and who can blame me? This year, I went with Cat from Red Dwarf. Next year, who can say? I do like two of the Oh That Guys, Kurt Fuller and Morgan Woodward.

Many happy returns to all the living on the list and to the dead, thanks for all the memories.
 

Predictor: FM-2030 in Upwing Priorities, published 1981

Prediction: Telebrain: How do we fastforward the human brain? Continued mapping of more and more of the brain. Implanted slow-release drugs to self-regulate moods and biochemical shift. Genetic engineering to regenerate aging brain cells – upgrade intelligence – deactivate vestigial parts of the brain.

Plug in/Plug off super microchip implants to amplify brain versatility and power. For example: millisec computations in the head with visual displays – instant access to info – hi-speed playback – simultaneous info retrieval/transmission. Implanted transceiver for direct brain to brain interface. Implanted sensors for continuous monitoring of all body functions and self-regulation of biorhythms and mood swings. By 2010 the human brain should emerge as a super telebrain – a powerful autonomous transceiver free of the animal body – able to connect with new replaceable bodies.

Reality: Remember last week when I had to begrudgingly admit the guy got some stuff right? This week, I don't have to begrudge anything, because nothing is as he predicted. The closest things might be FitBit and Google Glass, but they are wearable, not implanted. And biorhythms! Ah, it brings back memories.

I have to say, as annoying as his made-up words are, his punctuation and grammar irritate every bit as much. I wrote this one out verbatim, just to show how much this guy loved dashes.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

We meet our new regular Wednesday predictor.

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!
 

9 June 2014

 Birthdays
Mae Whitman b. 1988 (Boogeyman 2, Bionic Woman, Phil of the Future, Independence Day)
Natalie Portman b. 1981 (Thor, Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium, V for Vendetta, Star Wars, Mars Attacks!)
Katharine Cullen b. 1975 (Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, The Girl from Tomorrow)
Johnny Depp b. 1963 (Pirates of the Caribbean, Into the Woods, Alice in Wonderland, Transcendence, Dark Shadows [2012], The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, From Hell, Sleepy Hollow, The Astronaut’s Wife, Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare, Edward Scissorhands, A Nightmare on Elm Street)
David Koepp b. 1963 (writer, Snow White and the Huntsman 2, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, Zathura: A Space Adventure, War of the Worlds, Spider-Man, The Lost World: Jurassic Park, Jurassic Park, Death Becomes Her, The Shadow)
Michael J. Fox b. 1961 (Mars Attacks!, Shelley Duvall’s Bedtime Stories, Tales from the Crypt, Back to the Future, Teen Wolf)
James Newton Howard b. 1951 (composer/orchestrator, The Dark Knight, Signs, Atlantis: The Lost Empire, Unbreakable, The Sixth Sense, The Devil’s Advocate, Waterworld, Outbreak, Twilight Zone: The Movie)
Joe Haldeman b. 1943 (author, won 1976 Hugo and Nebula for The Forever War, won 1990 Nebula for the novella The Hemingway Hoax, won 1993 Nebula for the short story Graves, won 1999 Hugo and Nebula for Forever Peace, won 2006 Nebula for Camouflage)
Joan Marshall b. 1931 died 28 June 1992 (Star Trek, Twilight Zone, Men Into Space)
Lin Carter b. 1930 died 7 February 1988 (author, Callisto, Conan)
Leo Summers b. 1925 died 1 April 1985 (artist)
Keith Laumer b. 1925 died 23 January 1993 (author, Imperium, Retief)

The obvious choices for the Picture Slot: Natalie Portman (last year's featured artist), Johnny Depp, Michael J. Fox.

Somewhat less obvious choices: multiple award winning author Joe Haldeman, Joan Marshall because she was on the original Star Trek (attorney prosecuting Kirk in Court Martial, Elisha Cook Jr. was the defense)

My choice: A cover from a Retief novel by Keith Laumer. I loved the Retief novels when I was younger, but the covers have nothing to do with the character. Retief is a low level diplomat from earth. There's always some screw-up in relations with aliens and he always fixes it because though he is unassuming in his work, he's the smartest guy in the room. He's like an intergalactic Jeeves, though in Jeeves fictional world everyone knows and appreciates how clever he is. Almost always someone else take the credit for what Retief accomplishes.

I love Retief and Jeeves, but if forced to choose, I love Jeeves more, even before Stephen Fry played him. Jeeves should be older and smaller and balder than Fry, but Fry and Laurie were perfect together in that series.

Side note on the dead: Jeez, our dead birthday folk sure died young. Nobody made it to 70 and Carter and Summers didn't make it to 60.

Many happy returns to the living and to the dead, thanks for the memories and you all left the party too soon.

Movies released
Star Trek V: The Final Frontier released, 1989

Sex chip drawn by Matt Collins from Scientific American, 20 April 2009

Predictor: Professor Tipu Aziz of Oxford, quoted in The Australian on 22 December 2008

Prediction: In ten years' time (by 2018), people will have chips implanted in their brains that will simulate sex. Moreover, by 2015 there will be multiple implanted chip designs with a variety of applications.

Reality: Oh, yeah, there's an app for that. It should be noted that the movie Back to the Future: Part 2 also said there would be chips implanted in people's brains by 2015. Heck, there are enough glitches with FitBit, I don't see how anyone's going to go for chip implants directly into the brain. It should be noted that modern pacemakers are small computers and they work very well, but that not the same as directly into the brain. We still only understand the merest rudiments of how the brain works.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

Geoffrey Hoyle takes us to the exciting world of 2010.

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!

20 January 2014

Birthdays
Evan Peters b. 1987 (X-Men: Days of Future Past, American Horror Story, Kick-Ass, Invasion [TV])
Daniel Cudmore b. 1981 (Twilight, X-Men)
Crystal Lowe b. 1981 (Primeval: New World, Almost Human, Smallville, Supernatural, Stargate[TV])
Skeet Ulrich b. 1970 (Jericho, The Craft)
Rainn Wilson b. 1966 (Super, Monsters vs. Aliens, My Super Ex-Girlfriend, Galaxy Quest, Charmed, Dark Angel)
R. A. Salvatore b. 1959 (author, Forgotten Realms series)
Daniel Benzali b. 1950 (Jericho, The X-Files, Star Trek: The Next Generation)
David Lynch b. 1946 (director, Dune, Eraserhead)
Tom Baker b. 1934 (Doctor Who, The Golden Voyage of Sinbad, Frankenstein: The True Story)
Buzz Aldrin b. 1930 (astronaut)
Peter Donat b. 1928 (The X-Files)
Patricia Neal b. 1926 died 8 August 2010 (The Day the Earth Stood Still)
DeForest Kelley b. 1920, died 6/11/1999 (Star Trek)
Colin Clive b. 1900 died 25 June 1937 (Frankenstein, Bride of Frankenstein)
A. Merritt b. 1884 died 21 August 1943 (author, The Moon Pool, Burn Witch Burn!)

The birthdays on the list span slightly more than 100 years today, and for my money there are four people who deserve The Picture Slot in nearly equal measure. Last year on this date, I put up a picture of DeForest Kelley, and I promised to have Buzz Aldrin this year. But I've done more research now and if I keep this up for four years, Tom Baker, still the most popular Doctor after all these years, and Colin Clive, the original Dr. Frankenstein in the first two movies in the series, have to get a shot as well.

Many happy returns to the living on the list, and to the dead, thanks for all the memories.

Movies released
Underworld Awakening released, 2012
 

Predictor: OMNI Future Almanac

Prediction: in 2005, the first commercially viable biochip "interface" will be demonstrated. A volunteer will be connected by wire to a device that averages human brain waves and recognizes the wave that is a command to the computer by means of a biofeedback-learned code. The user will be able to answer any difficult question within thirty seconds by accessing the computer's massive database.

Reality: Oh, OMNI Future Almanac, you're adorable. This prediction isn't that much goofier than some of the stuff from our current regular Tuesday predictor Ray Kurzweil, but seeing the word "biofeedback" brought on a wonderful wave of nostalgia for me.

And since this section is labeled Reality instead of Enjoying the Quaint, I should say that nothing like this existed in 2005 and still doesn't exist today.

Looking one day ahead... INTO THE FUTURE!

Yes, tomorrow will be a Tuesday and we will hear from Ray Kurzweil with another prediction about 2009 from his 1999 book.

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!

31 December 2013

Birthdays
Bronson Pelletier b. 1986 (Twilight Saga, Dinosapien)
Steve Byers b. 1976 (Alphas, Total Recall [2012], Immortals, Smallville, The Dresden Files)
Bruce Ramsay b. 1966 (Hellraiser:Bloodline, Continuum, Riverworld, Supernatural, Babylon 5: The Lost Tales)
Val Kilmer b. 1959 (Red Planet, The Island of Dr. Moreau [1996], Batman Forever)
Bebe Neuwirth b. 1958 (Jumanji, Star Trek: The Next Generation)
James Remar b. 1953 (Horns, Transformers: Dark Side of the Moon, The Vampire Diaries, FlashForward, Jericho, Battlestar Galactica, Blade: Trinity, The X-Files, Judge Dredd, The Clan of the Cave Bear)
Jane Badler b. 1953 (V)
Barbara Carrera b. 1945 (Embryo, The Island of Dr. Moreau [1977])
Connie Willis b. 1945
(won 1993 Hugo and Nebula for Doomsday Book)
(won 1999 Hugo for To Say Nothing of the Dog)
(won 2011 Hugo and Nebula for Blackout/All Clear)
Ben Kingsley b. 1943 (Ender’s Game, Iron Man 3, Hugo, Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time, A Sound of Thunder, A.I., Alice in Wonderland, Species, Slipstream)
Anthony Hopkins b. 1937 (Thor, The Wolfman, Beowulf, Meet Joe Black, Dracula [1992])

Okay! Sometimes I write that there are honest to Odin movie stars on our birthday list. Who's here today?

Odin.

But Sir Anthony does not get the Picture Slot, because I wanted a Pretty Girl to counterbalance the human filth in the prediction section. Jane Badler would also have been an excellent choice in her iconic role on the original TV series V, but I have a soft spot in my heart for Bebe Neuwirth, regardless of the fact that she is nowhere near twenty feet tall.

Many happy returns of the day to all the birthday boys and girls on our list.
 
 

Prediction: On 23 March 2013, all American citizens must have a Radio Frequency Identification Device implanted in their hand, as mandated in the Obamacare bill.

Predictor: Pastor Paul Begley, 17 February 2012

Reality: Here's a link to his You Tube page.

Here's a link to Snopes.com, who calls bullshit on his You Tube page.

Undeterred, disgusting grifter Paul Begley changed the date of his prophecy (not unlike now extinct grifter emeritus Dr. Harold Camping) when it didn't come to pass this year to 31 December 2017, which is why I'm publishing it today.

This is an example of what I consider the biggest problem facing humanity today. If you want to believe a certain thing, you can use the Internet to feed you just the garbage you want to consume. As a bonus, those sources will tell you that anyone who disagrees is an idiot or a liar or both. Usually, there is a liberal vs. conservative split in these shouting matches, but not always. There is a feeling of the school yard arguments, with a lot of "No, you are!" repeated by both sides. We call them wingnuts and they call us libtards and both sides use the phrase "low information voters" to describe the other.

Who wrote "the center cannot hold"? Just some dirty Irish terrorist sympathizer. Good Americans like us can ignore that, right?

Looking one day... INTO THE FUTURE!

OMG! Is it like another whole new year already? What will happen then?

More birthdays! More predictions! More fabulous babes!

Join us then... IN THE FUTURE!